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Who's tha man with tha masta plan?

Code Name: Geller

Affiliation to Clark: Owner

Backround: Born in the back seat of a VW Bug. His parents, Ward and June Cleaver, considered him to be the family "accident". They really never brought him out during the day, except on Halloween and whenever the circus was in town. Ross' only friend was a small sack of moldy apples that he played with in the basement. He named the sack "Princess Hoozak the Third".

What's He Up To Now? 6/13/00  As of now, Ross is in North Carolina enjoying the wonderful life of a radio DJ. He works for The Hot FM and you can hear him on their internet broadcast. He is also making alot of money and has alot of fans and is the first of the clan to not only leave Schenectady but to also have a fan club. Go Ross! We salute you!

On October 4, 1981, Ross' house burnt down after "Princess Hoozak the Third" kicked over an oil lantern. Ross managed to escape but Princess Hoozak's remains were never found.

If you have any information as to the where-abouts of Princess Hoozak the Third, please send all information to the Find Princess Hoozak Fund. Thank you.

Help us Find Princess Hoozak


I can kill you with my mind!

Code Name: Phil

Affiliation to Clark: Devoted Follower

Backround: Growing up in a traveling circus hasn't done much for Phil's social life. Phil is sensitive to sunlight, jumpy around more than five people in a room, and he goes into convulsions when ever he is approached by a member of the opposite sex. Phil met up with Ross when the circus came to Ross' town. They were friends from the start. Ross had many stories to tell about the hundreds of adventures that he and Princess Hoozak had, and Phil... Well, he threw up when ever Ross looked him in the eye.

What's He Up To Now? 6/13/00  Right now, Phil works in the cafeteria of a local hospital. I haven't really heard much from him in a while, but what I do know is that he is doing real good. He has a girlfriend and his own place [This time it's above a dollar store] and he seems to be real happy. The more power to you Phil! I'm glad to see that you finally got something good going for you. Oh yea, he can also kill people with his mind. But that's not as cool as getting a girlfriend.


Please, no one ask about this picture.

Code Name: Suave

Affiliation to Clark: Devoted Follower

Backround: Awoke from his thousand year slumber by nuclear testing in the Artic, Suave was transformed into a 354 1/2 foot monster. Driven by a deranged mind and a nuclear capabilities, Suave proceded to ravage small islands and Starbucks across the world.

Suave's story really has no ending. Just trust me that he eventually was shrunken down to normal size and met up with Phil and Ross some where on the outskirts of Fargo, North Dakota.

What's He Up To Now? 6/13/00  At the moment Suave is updating the Clark page with a whole new look that he really enjoys. He is also talking in the first person. He has a girlfriend who he loves and despite what the picture above looks like, he is not a stripper, although he is known to get naked with out warning, especially on his webcam. You can read more about this amazing individual at his diary, so go be nosey!